Emperor Unsympathetic Towards Star Wars Underworld Cancellation Due to Sympathetic Emperor
LE GRAN PALPATINE ESTATES, NEVADA — It may be hard to tell from the slight grimace on his pruney face, but Emperor Sheev Palpatine has never been happier. Earlier today, His Excellency was informed of the complete and utter cancellation of Star Wars: Underworld, a planned live-action TV show. Although Palpatine had been aware the series was shelved some time ago, it wasn’t until today that his favorite manservant-in-purple Troian whispered an update on the show into his hooded ears.
“Twas cancelled because of you, milord. The producers attempted to make you sympathetic, and create a female antagonist that made your life a living Hell. Hahaha.”
Palpatine relished every word of the news, then proceeded to triple down on his unsympathetic nature by cutting a check for his good friend Donald Trump’s presidential campaign, and electrocuting Troian on the spot. Because reasons.
Never change, Sheev.
